Thursday, February 23, 2012

My Husband’s STD

My husband has what I call an STD: Situational Transition Daniel

What this means is, depending on the situation he is in; work, home, whatever… he transitions into a whole different person. While at one job… he is a completely different person than he is at the other job. And, from one person to the next, he is another person altogether.

I’ll read his work evaluations and wonder WHO IS THIS PERSON? And, why can I not have him too?

Daniel’s work area is always kept clean & organized. He finishes all projects in a timely manner & is first to go above & beyond to help others.


Daniel walks through the door and dumps his stuff all over the loveseat. He takes off his work shirt & hangs it on a chair, peels his socks off and they land where ever he may be. He leaves his dishes all over the house, hangers on the dining room light fixture, & has to be asked at least 20 times to do a simple chore like unloading the dishwasher. (After living here for almost 2 years, he still puts things away in the wrong spots)

I love the man to pieces… but sometimes, keeping up with both faces, is exhausting. Actually, it’s not even 2… it’s more like 3… 4… 5… etc.

Co-workers, acquaintances etc. I get it, I understand… I met him at work. He wasn’t the same person I worked with, once we became a couple & lived together etc.

If the people he encountered in life truly knew what he thought of some of them. Some, he does truly like. Speaks highly of them as people, employees, friends, family etc. Others… well… let’s just say they get the STD…

All I know… is that I have the ring… it’s me he married… I get all the faces, the good, the bad, & the ugly… and I’m glad MY Danny is real. Everyone else just has to wonder, don’t they?

Friday, January 27, 2012

Same Sh*t... Different Year

I haven't written anything in a few months...

I was really busy at work up until my last day on Christmas Eve. Hate being seasonal... of course I AM still available... but I'm not part of the clique. Whatevs.

I did finally get my van. She is a 2005 Dodge Grand Caravan SXT... all the bells & whistles... the kids love the remote sliding doors & the DVD player.

I finally had found another job... I was going to be going to Papa Ginos. Remember when I had my kidney infection last week. Well, apparently, they like to play games there. The told me they would call me on Tuesday before 2.
Even during my orientation, I was in ├╝ber pain... but I just sat there and pretended to be fine. They didn't need to know what was going on with my body.

I was in way too much pain to deal Tuesday... I waited all day for their call... around 1:30... I fell asleep. The percocet I took kicked in and I passed out.
I woke around 6. It was now too late to call them and see what was going on... I called the next day... but the manager wasn't in. Just as I was getting ready to try again on Thursday... they called me. I explained to them what had happened. They asked if my back "injury" was something that happened a lot... I didn't want to tell them my personal stuff (that it was a kidney infection), but I did assure them that it was just something that came on suddenly... but I was fine & eager to start. They told me that they would call me in a day or 2 with a schedule.

After not hearing anything through Tuesday, I called and ended up speaking to the MIT... he told me that they were disappointed that I hadn't called them. I assured him it was completely unintentional and that it was NOT something I ever do... he told me to call the manager on Thursday. (Today)

I got up this morning and called first thing in the am. I was informed that they had changed their minds about my employment. That I failed their "test"... I understand from their point of view... I do... I've been a manager... but I find it exceptionally petty and underhanded. Do I really want to work for a company that treats people with such disrespect?

Screw it.

I did discover a new website... Scary Mommy
For anyone who knows that sometimes being a parent/spouse is just hell... Check it out. You won't be disappointed.

Saturday, January 14, 2012

Damn You For Dying

Its been a year since you died, Brian.
WTF... you were my best friend... you were supposed to be here!
You missed my wedding damn you!

I should have let you stay with us again.
You were there for a month or so, the cigarette smoke was killing me... the lack of privacy... the damn country music channels on cable... don't think I didn't love being with you... but it was hard.

When you asked me if you would be able to come back & stay with us again... I should have let you. I would have forced you to go to the doctor that night. Dammit... you knew better. With your friggin diabetes, & heart issues... you KNEW BETTER!
If you had been here with me & Dan... maybe you wouldn't be dead now.
Your children wouldn't have lost their father... I wouldn't have lost my best friend.

I'm sorry Brian... I miss you so much.