Saturday, January 14, 2012

Damn You For Dying

Its been a year since you died, Brian.
WTF... you were my best friend... you were supposed to be here!
You missed my wedding damn you!

I should have let you stay with us again.
You were there for a month or so, the cigarette smoke was killing me... the lack of privacy... the damn country music channels on cable... don't think I didn't love being with you... but it was hard.

When you asked me if you would be able to come back & stay with us again... I should have let you. I would have forced you to go to the doctor that night. Dammit... you knew better. With your friggin diabetes, & heart issues... you KNEW BETTER!
If you had been here with me & Dan... maybe you wouldn't be dead now.
Your children wouldn't have lost their father... I wouldn't have lost my best friend.

I'm sorry Brian... I miss you so much.

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